Abstract: This talk explores the anxieties that dominate contemporary discourse about college campuses. It begins with lesson planning as the Virginia Tech Massacre was unfolding on cable news, and goes on to explore human subjectivity under privatization utilizing Fight Club, torture porn, and the short-lived cable reality show Campus PD as examples, ending with contemporary safe space controversies. Campus has long represented a space a part from the home. Under privatization, anything that cannot be owned and locked away is therefore suspect, creating a contradiction which increasingly defines the campus as a space to be distrusted.